


Yuuri 19th

by Glitter_on_Ice (Hawkgay)



Series: Glitter's unneeded but did anyway AU's [1]
Category: Alice 19th, Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alice 19th - Freeform, Alternate Universe, And Friendship, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Canon Compliant, Character's Name Spelled as Viktor, Depression, M/M, Magic, but everything turns out fine with the power of love, it's gonna get pretty dark though, the Alice 19th AU no one asked for but did anyway
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-27
Updated: 2017-02-27
Packaged: 2018-09-27 04:57:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,055
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9968300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hawkgay/pseuds/Glitter_on_Ice
Summary: Unable to stop himself Yuri found himself speaking.“Can't you leave me alone for once, I don't see what Viktor sees in you honestly. Sometimes I wish you weren't here.”The words fell out of his mouth like he wasn't the one controlling them, full of vitriol and hate Yuri didn't normally have in him. Immediately he regretted what he said as guilt pooled in his gut. Slowly Yuuri stood up while the younger skater tried to apologise, his voiced trapped in his throat. A void of nothingness materialized by the hallway door, a black fog swirling out of it. The light drained from Yuuri's eyes as his face became a blank mask.or Yurio gains a mysterious gift and unleashes a dark power. accidentally making Yuuri disappear into the darkness of his inner heart. Leaving Viktor and Yurio to go in there and face the demon's within





	1. Na Sadaru Lotis Raan

**Author's Note:**

> Lotis words will be in italics while Maram words are in bold.  
> Unbeta'd like everything I write  
> you don't really need to read Alice 19th to understand this but it's a good manga and worth a look at.

The orange light of sundown in Hasetsu caught the red bead threaded on a white cord that hung on Yuri's wrist as he played with it. Laid out on the tatami with his long hair spread out he examined the symbol engraved on the bead's surface. Beautiful and strange he wondered what it meant and why it turned up. Finding it in his pocket a few hours after becoming friends with Otabek. Worried one of his well meaning fans had snuck it in there Yuri didn't give the bracelet a second glance before shoving it into one of his bags in his hotel room. Forgetting about it completely the next day felt off, his anger quicker to boil over with an unusual vicious undercurrent. At breakfast Yuri accidentally snapped at Otabek, he couldn't even remember why just one moment they were talking and the next he'd let loose a tirade of pure venom. Ashamed he ran away and tried to keep moving through the day, eventually giving up. Locked inside his room Yuri paced to and fro, some how on autopilot he started to tear through his bags until he found the bracelet. Putting it on a wave of calmness spread through him. The next day he apologised sincerely to Otabek without an ounce of Yuri's normal prickly demeanour, even offering a cursory sorry to anyone else who'd ended up in his war path. Whatever the fuck the bracelet was made of made him want to try and bridge the gaps with people he used to deem useless.

 

Which had landed Yuri here back in Japan to help Katsudon pack so he could move to Russia. Yuri thought Viktor used to be insufferable before but now engaged to the pig he'd become a soppy bastard. Trying to get anything productive done with Viktor whining Yuuuri every five minutes was impossible. While he shoving clothes into a box he heard a commotion happening behind him, turning around to find Viktor pouncing at Yuuri and kissing him. Closer inspection showed a sheath of posters spread out on the floor, all with the old man's face. Oh great like Viktor needed more validation that the pig adored him. When Yuuri started to reciprocate quite enthusiastically Yuri gave up and escaped into the Katsuki's family living room to contemplate what had he done wrong in life to be stuck with those two assholes. Rubbing his eyes Yuri didn't notice the hallway door slide open, a person poked their head through and stood still. Brown eyes watched fondly at the scene before breaking the silence.

“Yuri, my mother wanted to know if you wanted some tea-” Yuuri quickly stopped when he noticed the bracelet. Stepping into the room fully he exclaimed “Oh a _Lotis_ word, I didn't know you could use them.”

Sitting up in an instant Yuri stared at the other man confused. Only working out what he meant when Yuuri pulled up a sleeve and showed off a identical bracelet. “ _Lotis_ what? You know what this freaky thing means,” he gestured at the accessory with his arm. Yuuri moved towards the free space next to Yuri and lowered himself down.

“Maybe, I never studied them too closely so knowledge is limited. I can show you the ones I have if you want?”

“Why not, you're already here and you might have the same one as me anyway”

Bringing up his wrist to Yuri's eye level Yuuri began to go through his five beads “Okay this one is _Sama_ meaning path, next is _Ruta_ or persevere after that is _Rangu_ also known as courage than its _Riiya_ or barrier in English terms and finally _Iru_ , double meaning of fire and passion,” Once Yuuri got to each one he held it under the slowly fading light to show off the symbols engraved on them.

Yuri shook his head “Nah, none of them look like mine,” mirroring Yuuri's action he pushed his wrist under the other skater's nose to let him have a look.

Examining it closely the pig smiled softly and replied “How lucky, its _San_. It represents friendship, may I ask when you found it”

“Day before the Grand Prix, I found it in my pocket”

“Well do you know if anything meaningful happened.”

Yuri mentally went over the events of that day until he remembered being accosted by his angels then rescued by Otabek. If it meant friendship than the only conclusion was him accepting Otabek's offer probably had something to do with it. Not like every day someone saves you on a motor bike than compliments you over something dumb that happened years ago. Blushing Yuri made himself smaller by bringing his knees up to his chin and hugging his legs. Yuuri with a knowing look seemed to have understood without a word his realization, his red face a confirmation. Anger welled up inside Yuri, he hated it when people assumed they understood him, like they knew the storm swirling around his head most days. An urge came over him to lash out, to hurt the well meaning person beside him. Unable to stop himself Yuri found himself speaking.

“ **Can't you leave me alone for once, I don't see what Viktor sees in you honestly. Sometimes I wish you weren't here.”**

The words fell out of his mouth like he wasn't the one controlling them, full of vitriol and hate Yuri didn't normally have in him. Immediately he regretted what he said as guilt pooled in his gut. Slowly Yuuri stood up while the younger skater tried to apologise, his voiced trapped in his throat. A void of nothingness materialized by the hallway door, a black fog swirling out of it. The light drained from Yuuri's eyes as his face became a blank mask.

His mouth mechanically began to move and a low depressed voice chattered,“I'm sorry for being a nuisance. Guess I can't help but mess up I mean you're right what does Viktor see in me. I'll go now before I do anything else wrong.” Turning his back to Yuri he walked towards the void and let it envelope him.

Yuri blinked and then everything seemed to go back to normal. The room appeared fine, nothing out of place except for the absence of Yuuri. Tears began to stream down his face as he tried to make sense of what happened. It must have been a hallucination from the sleep deprivation or he ate something that didn't agree with him. People just don't vanish out of nowhere, maybe Yuri made up the entire last few minutes and Katsudon would be with Viktor. Taking a in a few deep breathes he forced himself to not have a panic attack as the feeling of wrongness over took him. Scrabbling off the floor Yuri slid the hallway door with a bang and ran to Viktor's old room. At this point seeing the two of them making out was preferable to the dread making its home in his abdomen. Barging in Yuri just found Viktor pottering about with his belongings without a care in the world. Collapsing onto the floor Yuri had expected to find Yuuri cuddling up to Viktor, being the lovey dovey idiots he loathed to admit he cared about.

Noticing him Viktor turned around, his usual grin faltering when he saw Yuri's face. Dropping the books in his hands he rushed to the younger skater, worrying overtaking his normally delicate features. “Yura what's wrong? Please tell me,” Viktor asked not even bothering with the stupid nickname and instead used the one he'd called Yuri last year as rinkmates.

“Yuuri's gone,” he managed to whimper out, not caring if he sounded pathetic.

“What do you mean gone, like to the ice rink, to the shop. You need to be more specific than that”

“Like fucking gone. We were talking and I shouted at him but not like how I usually am, it had more nastiness behind it. Afterwards he looked so downtrodden then he disappeared into thin air.”

“This is not good, the last few days he's been on edge from the move. I'm sure if you say sorry he'll understand. Come let's go look for him, he can't have gone to far.” Helping Yuri up off the floor the two of them separated to get ready to go search.

 

Leaving the warmth of the inn for the darkened streets of Hasetsu Yuri and Viktor stayed close to each other for comfort. The air thick with gloom, a cold wind bit at the two men. Even though both of them were Russian they found themselves wrapping their coats tighter as they found the once happy streets of the town unwelcoming. Desperately Viktor started to call for Yuuri while Yuri scanned every road they went past. Any passer bys were few and far between and interrogated fully if they'd seen the skater, all of them shaking their heads and replying no. Outside Minako's dance studio they found it dark and empty, hopelessness started to set in. Where could Yuuri have gone without telling anyone at the inn, without someone noticing him walk by. Viktor tried desperately to remain calm, his fiancé left all the time whenever his anxiety got to bad. A traitorous voice at the back of his head unhelpfully adding not like this, not without a note. Viktor's worried thoughts went into overdrive, coming up with horrific scenarios on what happened to Yuuri, each one worse than the last. A solitary tear rolled down his cheek, giving into the fear within. A sharp tug broke him out of it as Yuri started to drag him forward and Viktor let him. Not stopping until they made it somewhere familiar.

 

Outside Minako's bar they stood for several minutes, the lights on the sign beckoning to come in yet neither Viktor or Yuri could find the strength to take the few steps to go inside. The pull of remaining in their despair to great. Finally Viktor broke the stalemate by pushing open the door and entering. Minako had her back to them as she went about counting glasses for opening. Viktor strode forward with Yuri trailing a few steps behind notifying her to their presence. Facing them Minako gave him a piercing gaze, taking in both his ruffled clothes and tear stains on his face. Without a word she took out a shot glass and filled it with the vodka she acquired specially for Viktor who dropped himself onto a barstool and knocked it back.

“Judging by how bad you look someone has had a fight with their brand new fiancé”

“Wish it was that but we can't find Yuuri, we were hoping you'd seen him”

“He told me he was taking a few days off to pack so no,” Minako replied ignoring Viktor for a moment to appraise Yuri, hood up he seemed to fold in on himself while slight rocking back and forth. Bring attention to him she asked “Yurio what happened, come on tell me”

For a moment it seemed her question would remain unanswered than the floodgates broke, Yuri hysterically babbled “I didn't mean it to happen. With all this crap going on things got to me and I lashed out. It's not even like they were my words they just forced themselves out of my mouth. I really didn't want Yuuri to go.”

Slamming her hand down on the counter Minako made both of them jump “Yurio give me the exact details on what happened. For Yuuri's sake it's important you don't leave anything out”

Yuri began to recount what occurred only an hour ago, starting with the strange bracelet. Explaining that Yuuri found him messing with it and showed he had one too. When he got to the part where he snapped and said some very horrible things he broke down. Sobbing quietly Viktor comforted as Minako poked at him to continue. Finishing his story with Yuuri vanishing into a hole of darkness. Grabbing a second glass Minako poured herself a glass of the clear liquid and drank it in one gulp.

“This is bad, really really bad.”

“How bad and does it have anything to do with Yura's strange bracelet cause” Viktor showed off his wrist with a flourish and presented an identical trinket to Yuri's.

“Well congrats you both can use _Lotis_ words. Why am I not surprised two new people gained the gift after spending years searching for more masters.” Minako started to hunt underneath the bar while Viktor and Yuri tried to understand what she just said. Finding it she brought out an old cardboard box and emptied it onto the counter. Three wooden boxes were put to one side while Minako placed a book and chart with the same odd symbols on each bracelet. She then went into a long winded explanation on the _Lotis_ and how it came to be. Its use in helping people and the history behind the words. The original master Lotsan had ten disciples and one of them went rogue perverting the practice by creating their own dark words that took power from the blackness within humanity's hearts. Something that still plagued people today.

Viktor interrupted her as she went over each symbol and what it represented, “So you're saying we have magical powers,” he sounded like he didn't believe everything he was just told. Even after being shown Minako's sixteen _Lotis_ beads and her filling up a glass with water she conjured after saying one of them.

“In a way yes,” exasperated Minako answered, annoyed at her authority being questioned.

“How does this tie in with Yuuri's disappearance and Yura's involvement again?” Viktor asked.

“Yurio accidentally used the **Maram** words and sent him into the inner darkness of his heart,” Minako curtly replied. Yuri continued paced from end of the bar to the other whispering under his breath that it was all his fault.

Minako tried to sooth the youth by saying “Don't beat yourself up about it Yuri, this was always a when it would happen not an if. Yuuri's fears have run deep for many years, even after he learnt a few _Lotis_ words he could never shake them off. Last year I honestly believed the **Maram** monsters would consume him last year after he failed the Grand Prix, Viktor actually saved him when things were turning critical. It's why the two of you will need to go into Yuuri's heart and defeat his demons before they devour him whole”

the last bit Minako had told them perked Yuri's attention yelling “Wait why the fuck do we have to go, you seem to know more than us”

“I can't, last year I tried and he blocked me out. Only the people closest to him will be able to enter and that's you two”

Before Yuri could make a retort Viktor stopped him to reply “We'll do it, can you please recite the words we have to say to get in again?”

“ _Na Sadaru Lotis Raan_ but you need to be somewhat physically close to him for it to work.”

“Don't worry Yura, I know where he is” a smile went across of Viktor's face, Yuuri was easy to predict after all. Grabbing the chart of symbols he exited the bar, not even waiting for the other skater to follow him.

 

With purpose Viktor walked quickly towards the one other place Yuuri would go when upset, the Ice Castle. Yuri out of breath was trying to keep up with the older man's pace, wishing his legs would finally grow so he could catch up. Night had finally settled in, the sky filled with a blank mass of clouds blocking out the moon and stars. Yuri thought over how Viktor received the bead _Utei_ , the banquet Yuuri couldn't recall had given his idol an awaking long needed to pursue more in life than just figure skating. Which is what _Utei_ meant, to either awaken or see. Much better than goddamn friendship anyway. Viktor stopped suddenly causing Yuri to bump into him and fall on his ass. As he was about to let out a tirade of anger he realized they were at the ice rink. Grumbling he picked himself up and waited to see what Viktor would do. Sensibly he went and tried the glass doors, finding them locked tight. Leaving him to try and pry open the door Yuri circled around the building, looking for another way in. Every loose window or door refused to budge, all stuck fast as if something glued them shut. Back at the front Viktor had also given up, resting against the glass he waited for Yuri.

“No luck, everything is shut tight.”

“Yuuri's in there, I can feel him. We're at the right place,” ever since they arrived Viktor had heard his fiancé call to him. Not in words but with music, Stammi Vicino played quietly inside. “Now let's say the words and hope it works.” Viktor closed his eyes and concentrated, in duet the two skaters recited _Na Sadaru Lotis Raan._ Nothing happened than their bodies shifted. The sensation of travelling a miles without taking a step overtook him. Opening his eyes Viktor found himself somewhere new but familiar. Yuri and him were at the Inn.

  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alice 19th is one my fave manga's and my first ever as well. I love it dearly and I ended up playing around with the idea of the characters from YOI with the same powers. it was gonna star Yuuri saving people then I realized his mental baggage actually fit in with 3 of the Maram words so he ended up being the one cast into darkness. sorry if anything is too OOC, I tried my hardest.  
> I also have a Chobits styled AU kicking around my head I may do eventually.
> 
> please leave comments and Kudos


	2. Veeta (Hide)

Rain clattered loudly onto the roof as Viktor and Yuri attempted to reorientate themselves. Standing inside the entrance hall of Yu-topia they could hear the din of the place at full capacity, a mixture of voices, footsteps and glasses clinking. Faintly underneath all that was the sound of crying, a mournful wail that seemed to reverberate through the walls. Yuri then noticed the mirror in the middle of his chest with four bands of intricately decorated gold fabric looping behind him and a fifth hanging down at the front. Rubbing the cloth between his fingers he discovered the weird harness was made out of heavy silk. Glancing at Viktor, Yuri saw him wearing the same bizarre contraption. Before being able to comment on their strange appearances the crying suddenly became louder drawing the two of them towards one of the doors that led into the main part of the building. Opening it they were brought face to face with a hallway unlike any they had ever come across. It stretched further than a corridor should, the end only distantly visible to the naked eye. Every few feet on either side were doors, all slightly open and leaking noise. Freaked out Yuri backed up away from the anomalous hallway and clapped his hands over his mouth. Viktor just kept rubbing his eyes in disbelief, hoping that if he did it enough things would go back to normal. Frantically Yuri checked all the other doors in the room, finding the same irregular corridor behind every single one except for the front entrance. Which showed the front area of Yu-topia drenched in rain. Returning back to Viktor he found the skater using the house phone hanging on a wall, slamming it back onto the receiver when it didn't work.

“This place is creeping me the fuck out, how are we supposed to find Katsudon in here,” Yuri exclaimed in annoyance.

“I guess splitting up is the only option. We'll cover more ground that way,” Viktor purposed.

“Fine but I'm not going near that freaky hallway, you can search there. I'm gonna check if we can leave through the front,” Yuri didn't turn back as he left Viktor alone, whatever was going on some time apart would do the both of them good.  


 

***

 

Yuri found himself standing underneath the awning at the front of Yu-topia, far away from the freaky dimensions inside. Peering out he watched as the rain came down in sheets from dark grey storm clouds, making it impossible to see further than a few feet ahead. Unwilling to return indoors to the wrongness within Yuri debated in his head his next action. Glancing at the torrent Yuri mumbled a curse and abandoned his shelter to brave the deluge of water. In seconds he was soaked to the bone as he walked towards the main gate. He fucking hated rain, hated getting wet unless it was a nice long shower or bath, hated how his hair stuck to his neck. Why had he chosen this again, oh right because the mundaneness of rain was far more preferable to whatever the fuck was happening inside. Jolted out of his thoughts Yuri yelped as he tripped over into a massive puddle of mud. Swearing he picked himself up off the ground and checked his clothes, everything had a thin layer of muck except for the weird harness which appeared perfectly clean. Once this whole stupid thing finished the pig was going to wash his clothes. Sighing in frustration Yuri bent down to dig around through the mud, trying to find what he'd tripped on. Feeling something he pulled it out and examined it. A lone child's ballet slipper, broken and battered hung from a ribbon in his hand. Wondering who it belonged to Yuri shoved it in his pocket.

Starting to walk again he soon made it to the main gate of Yu-topia. Yuri then realized any escape from the abnormal behaviour of this dreamlike world would be impossible. A chest high river of water cascaded down what used to be a road, which should have flooded the onsen. Except an invisible barrier blocked the torrent from entering. Giving Yuri the peculiar sight of watching several debris float past underwater, including a bike still with a lock attached. Sidling up close to the intangible wall he poked at it gently with his index finger. Expecting something solid Yuri discovered it gave no resistance, allowing him to slide his hand fully into the cold surge of water. Curious he pushed in further, waving his limb up and down. Without warning Yuri felt a powerful current tug at his arm, forcing him nearer to the boundary between Yu-topia and the river. He battled the water to release him, looking for anything to hold on to with his other hand. Gripping tightly onto a wall Yuri pulled using all his strength as his head began to be submerged underwater, for a moment he thought it was all in vain before the pressure lessened and he fell backwards. Landing in a puddle the second time that day, only in this case ass first. Shouting towards the sky “Fuck this,” Yuri stood up and started to stomp back towards the inn. Anything was better than the bullshit he just dealt with.

  


***

 

Elsewhere Viktor had begun the arduous task of exploring each room of the long hallway to find the source of the crying. The first one he went into was full of people laughing and singing, all with a blank surface where their faces should be. Ignoring the wailing that could be heard through the walls. Disturbed he quickly left and tried the next room along, again Viktor found the same scene. Faceless patrons somehow eating and drinking while they acting like the heartbreaking crying didn't exist. In his bones he knew the person in distress was Yuuri, beautiful Yuuri who didn't realize how much people cared for him. Continuing his search Viktor checked each room he walked past, only discovering over and over again that they were all identical. The crying neither getting closer or further away. Barely halfway down the corridor Viktor started to feel dejected and desolate. Slumped against a wall he wondered how could he find Yuuri in all this madness. Every room was uniform in appearance, making it impossible to know many he'd passed. Viktor couldn't give up though, seeing his fiance again far more important than his own inner conflict. Gathering back his composure Viktor became aware things had gone silent. Quietly he heard a snuffling behind him, turning around he found a small child looking up at him. Big brown eyes and a dark mop of black hair told Viktor he was gazing at a very young version of Yuuri. One he'd only seen in photo albums. Tears ran freely down Yuuri's round cheeks as he stared at Viktor for several long seconds before bolting.  


Chasing after the apparition Viktor almost lost him as Yuuri ran unnaturally quick ahead of him. Sounds of merriment returned as the child entered one of the many doors. Following Viktor watched on in horror while little Yuuri completely disappeared through a wall, leaving no trace he'd even been there. Panicking Viktor tried to get to the wall and made the mistake of getting too close to one of the faceless guests. A hand grabbed at him and pulled him down next to a woman with long black hair, who held onto to him tightly. Viktor fruitlessly tried to escape, finding more and more people pinning him down. A glass was pressed against his lips and a liquid forced into his mouth, unable to spit it out Viktor swallowed the strange drink. It felt warm and comforting as it went down his throat. All fight within him dissipated, a dopey smile spreading on his face. Joining the festivities Viktor let several faceless figures dance with him, wondering why he ever attempted to leave such a fun atmosphere. Distantly he remembered there had been someone important he was looking for, vaguely he recalled dark brown eyes full of pain and tears staining their cheeks. Quickly Viktor forgot that trail of thought while in the background the sound of crying started again. Viktor didn't notice.

  


***

  


Back at the entrance hall Yuri had just returned indoors to discover what looked like a miniature version of Makkachin waiting for him. Yipping incessantly it ran towards Yuri and started to jump at his legs. Reaching down he tried to stroke the dog but instead the animal bit his hand and moved back. Annoyed Yuri nursed his hand while the dog cocked its head and barked. As of the little brown poodle was asking to be followed. Ignoring it Yuri pondered if his life really had become a fucked up Disney movie or a hallucination. He clung desperately at the idea this whole adventure was some vivid nightmare except the throbbing ache in his hand made it apparent it was painfully real. With nothing to lose Yuri let the poodle escort him down the never ending hallway. Eventually being led to a door three quarters down. Opening it he came across the sight of Viktor talking animatedly with several faceless men and women who all appeared to be engrossed in whatever bullshit came out of the skater's mouth. Great so while Yuri got himself soaked and covered in mud looking for his stupid fiance, Viktor had been having fun. Pissed he felt something well up inside of him, taking a deep breath he let it out.

_Pasa (Truth)_

The room changed, the patrons going from healthy looking to thin and gaunt. Their clothing stained and skin dirty they continued to party on. The once delectable food and intoxicating alcohol turning rotten and foul. All entranced in the celebration to the point of wasting away. Wrinkling his nose in disgust Viktor finally came to his senses, remembering where he was and what he'd been looking for. He disentangled himself from the mass of bodies with great difficulty and stood up. Looking at the pitiful scene around, Viktor got the distinct impression everyone here was hiding from something. He felt sympathy for them, he'd been like that once. Hiding from the world until his walls were broken down by Yuuri. As a last mercy Viktor held his bracelet up and chanted.

_Utei (Awaken)_

The spell broke, releasing the party goers from their trance. The faceless people looked around confused at their surroundings. Silently wondering how long they'd been stuck in this evil place. One by one they started to leave in slow procession. The crying in the background turning quieter. Viktor and Yuri waited for them to all leave before speaking to each other.

Viktor noticed the state of Yuri's clothes and teased “You look like something the cat dragged in Yurio, I guess going outside wasn't the best idea.”

“Shut up old man, at least I hadn't lost my fucking mind and joined in on the most depressing party ever,” Shot back Yuri, not at all in the mood for Viktor's bullshit.

“I am thankful Yura, I don't think I could've gotten out of that myself,” in a more sincere voice Viktor replied then he noticed the poodle peeking out from behind Yuri's legs, “Who's this sweet boy, he looks just like Makkachin.” Kneeling down Viktor started to scratch the pup's ears who then flopped over and showed off his belly for petting.

“dunno, found him waiting for me when I came back indoors. He's the one who led me to you”

“I think this is Vic-chan, Yuuri's old dog. He must know how much I mean to his Papa and found you to save me. Isn't that right Vic-chan, you are such a good boy bringing Yurio to me,” saying the last bit in a baby voice. Viktor fussed the dog's stomach until the animal stood back up and ran out of the door. Making the older skater shout “Wait, where are you going.”

 

Pursuing the dog Yuri and Viktor observed that the hallway had drastically shrunken and a new door added at the end. They both recognized it as Yuuri's bedroom. Vic-chan trotted on towards his master's room, while the two skater's lagged behind him. Scratching at the door, he waited as the door opened slightly and let in the loyal animal. Yuri flat out sprinted leaving Viktor behind, trying to reach the opening before it closed. Just as he was about to make it the door slammed shut. Forcing him to stop suddenly so he wouldn't collide with it. He attempted to pull it open but to his dismay it was locked. Frustrated Yuri screamed and started to bang his fists against the wood until dejectedly he gave up. Tears pricked his eyes, he was so angry at himself. Everything that had happened had been his fault, if he'd just been nicer to Yuuri there wouldn't be a reason for Viktor to risk his life to save him in the first place. Viktor must hate him for this, fuck it he hated himself for what he'd done. Someone turned Yuri around and strong armed him into a bone crushing hug.

“Yura I want you to understand I don't blame you,” without having to ask Viktor had guessed why Yuri was so out of sorts. Even being so dense he somehow could hit the nail on the head by accident sometimes.

“But this is all cause of what I said,”Muffled by cloth Yuri replied.

“Minako told us Yuuri's been battling this long before you said anything. Just remember that he only let us in cause we mean that much to him. Both me and him trust and care about you so please stop beating yourself up. I can't lose you as well.”

Pushing Viktor off of him Yuri wiped his nose on a clean part of his hoodie and said “If you tell anyone you saw me cry I will fucking murder you in your sleep.”

A heart shaped smile plastered on his face Viktor was happy to see Yuri's normal grumpy demeanour return answering with a “understood Yura, I'll keep this secret with me to the grave.”

“good, now I think I have an idea how to open this goddamn door,” Yuri span around and faced the door, he felt the same strange power from before build up inside of him. Understanding it was the _Lotis_ working through him. Readying himself Yuri pulled back his leg and while he let it swing into a kick he shouted.

_Vimiku (Release)_

The door sprang open, entering Yuri and Viktor took in their surroundings. Children's toys and drawings were scattered around the room. Ballet trophies were proudly displayed on the desk in the corner with dance clothes draped on the chair tucked under it. It appeared empty until a small yip drew them to a spot behind the bed. Vic-chan stared at them from the arms of very scared looking Yuuri who seemed to be trying to make himself smaller so he wouldn't be seen. Viktor moved closer and smiled at the young child, doing his best to comfort him. That's when things turned to shit. Yuuri's body began to become transparent, almost completely invisible he put Vic-chan down, grinned creepily and in a deep voice said.

**Veeta (Hide)**

Yuri watched in horror as one of Viktor's legs turned clear, leaving only a smoky shape where it should be. Unsure what to do Viktor foolishly kept trying to calm down the obviously not Yuuri. Causing his other leg to vanish. Yuri pulled him back when Vic-chan started to transform. No longer the sweet poodle from before he'd turned into a dog shaped monster with far too many teeth and very long sharp claws. Snarling it appeared to size up each one of its opponents then lunged itself at Viktor. Defending himself with his arms the poodle monster bit down hard and worried the limb it had a hold of. Struggling to shake it off Viktor used himself as a shield to protect Yuri who stood frozen in shock. Unable to move Yuri took his eyes off the bloody fight in front of him to where not Yuuri had sequestered himself. Hands over his ears the apparition was curled into a ball shaking like a leaf, showing how much it disliked the brawl it caused. Somehow finding the strength Yuri used the commotion as a distraction and crept close to the not Yuuri. Embracing him he shielded the child as Viktor shouted.

_Jeta (Fight)_

Causing a blast of energy to shoot out of his hands and send the poodle monster flying. Injured only slight the beast returned to its feet and went right back to mauling Viktor. Not paying attention to the scuffled Yuri gently stroked the not Yuuri's back and pulled out the ballet slipper he found earlier. He could feel the isolation plaguing the child and understood it very well. Until recently he'd kept himself to himself, rejecting anyone who tried to pry inside his little bubble. Only allowing people in when Yuuri had shown kindness to him during Onsen on Ice. As Yuri noticed his hand disappearing he dangled the shoe in front of the apparition.

Yuri started to talk to the not Yuuri while more parts of his body began to turn transparent “I think this belongs to you, I found it outside. I'm sorry if it's a little dirty. You may not be the real Yuuri but I do think he's listening, I feel really bad for shouting earlier. I don't say it often enough but our friendship is something important to me, I'm glad I met you and I really didn't mean the nasty words I said. So can you please stop trying to hurt Viktor, I'm pretty sure you want him in one piece even though him being injured would mean we'd win the next few competitions,” Yuri managed one final smile, believing himself too late to fix things.

He could vanish happily knowing he at least admitted the truth of his heart. Closing his eyes he waited for oblivion to take him, opening them when he felt a wet nose press itself against his hand. Vic-chan back to normal gazed at him with his tongue lolling out of his mouth, Yuri then noticed he'd become solid again. Not Yuuri pulled himself away from Yuri, clasping the slipper he returned the smile. Picking up Vic-chan not Yuuri and the dog evaporated, leaving the room empty except for Yuri and Viktor. Sad that the apparition had gone Yuri went to check on the other skater who was breathing rather heavily after doing something he never trained for. Bleeding from several puncture wounds in his arm Yuri ripped off a piece of clean cloth from his t shirt and gently wrapped them up. Behind them something clicked, turning around they found the cupboard door slightly ajar. Wind blew through it showing the two of them the next leg of their journey which was far from over.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I spent the whole night writing this fucker and at this point I don't care if there is a bunch of repetitive shit. let's just say it's intentional parallel story telling and leave it at that.
> 
> Yes I know Yuuri didn't have Vic-chan when he was that young, the whole point of this inner monster is that Yuuri feels small like a child and lonely. I'm probably being to hard on myself honestly. 
> 
> anyway enjoy
> 
> also forgot to mention want to speak to me here are my three tumblrs. my main [Pokemon-pop-princess](http://pokemon-pop-princess.tumblr.com/), Writing one [Saturnsilenceao3](http://saturnsilenceao3.tumblr.com/) and my YOI one [Glitter-on-Ice](https://glitter-on-ice.tumblr.com/)


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